Chaka kaya super naiinggit!

ni  Pete Ampoloquio, Jr.

Dahil nanganganib na ang noo’y eskalerang hosting career, tulala na ang chabokang si Fermi Chakita. Hahahahahahahahahahaha! Sa true, never talagang inakala ng taling-harap na radio and personality na  matitigok ang kanyang flourishing hosting career na namayagpag talaga nang husto noong dekada nobenta. Hahahahahahahahahaha!

Not even in her wildest fantasy did the obese TV host come to expect that the time would come when she’d be relegated to the background and be treated as a veritable has been and a trash as well.

Hahaa hahahahahahahahahaha!

Imagine, sa show nilang rating-less ay ignominiously demoted na lang siya bilang isang field reporter at se-cond fiddle sa mga personalidad na ‘di hamak na mas bata at inexperienced compared sa kanya. Pero ang sabi nga niyan, beggars just can’t afford to be choosy.

Pero tinitiis na lang ng okok na TV host ang kanyang ignominious demotion dahil beggars nga naman just can’t afford to be choosy. Hahahahahahahahaha! At any rate, feel na feel pa rin niyang binibira-bira sa kanyang AC/DC (attack and collect bagah! Hahahahaha!) columns ang Queen of All Media na si Kris Aquino. Hahahahahahahahahaha!

Gimick-oriented daw at mahilig magpapansin si Tetay at trip na trip daw nitong manggamit ng kung sino-sinong personalidad para lang mapag-usapan. Hahahahahahahahahahaha!

And so fucking what? Hakhakhakhakhakhak!

At least si Kris, marami ang humahanga sa kanyang riveting intelligence at dazzling personality.

Ikaw, do people admire you for what you are, Bubonika?

Sad to say, without your thickly foundationed face and heavily glossed lips, how would you look?

Yuck!Yuck!Yuck!

Hahahahahahahahahahahaha!

Nagparetoke na kasi, (nagparetoke na raw kasi, o! Hahahahahahaha!) hindi pa isinama ang pagsasaayos ng kanyang super pug nose.

Sa true, nakahahabag (Hayan, lolang mukhang Kabakab, salitang ugat ang inuulit. Hindi kaya sa row 4 ka na naman maupo na katabi ng saksakan nang bahong basurahan dahil sa katangahan mo! Hahahahaha!) ka lola.

Nagpi-feeling maganda kasi pero nakapangi-ngilabot naman ang kanyang lapses in grammar, Pilipino na nga ang medium na kanyang gina-gamit. Hahahahahahahahahahahahaha!

Bago kasi punasan ang uling sa mukha ng iba, pakipunasan muna ang uling sa sarili mong mukha para hindi nakahihiya, Gurang Perfect, (Gurang Perfect daw, o! Hahahaha!)

Why don’t you take a most intimate look at yourself?

Hahahahahahahahahahahaha!

Masyado ka kasing nagpi-feeling maganda gayong nang magsabog ng kagandahan sa mundong ibabaw, ni katiting ay wala kang nasalo. Hahahahahahahahahaha!

How sad naman for this delusional old matrona.

‘Yun lang!

A NEW SHOW THAT BEARS WATCHING!

Travelogue, the one that’s being anchored by the intelligent and charismatic Magnolia May San Jose, is soon to detonate in Net 25 starting April 19. It’s host may not be that famous yet but she’s been around for quite sometime already and was into radio hosting at DWSS a year or two ago.

Para sa kanilang unang episode, the whole group (Ms. Magnolia, the show’s EP Mr. Harold and its house director Mr. Arnel Ramos Felix) tra-velled all the way to the faraway but inordinately panoramic Palawan just to present a good show.

And basing from what we’ve seen, the group have inordinately succeeded.

Napakaganda at napaka-enthralling ng Palawan kaya naman pala na-in love ang grupo sa nasabing lugar pati na rin sa mga taong masyadong naging mababait sa kanila at entertaining.

Ang direktor nga pala ng Travelogue na si Direk Arnel ay matagal nang nagso-shoot ng documentaries at gumagawa ng MTVs ng mga singer na kadalasa’y ginagamit nila sa kanilang international performances.

Sosyal, di ba naman? Hahahahahahahaha!

Anyhow, good luck guys. I have this gut feeling that basing from what we’ve seen, you have a good travelogue show. Malaking factor rin na ang Net 25 ang inyong napili since it’s definitely one of the hot networks at the moment.

Still on Travelogue, commendable ang musical scoring ni Mr. Armor Rapista na more on percussion music ang kanyang ginamit.

Maraming salamat nga pala kay Jovi Loza na nag-invite sa amin ni Papa Abs.

BONGGA ANG ROLE NI MS. AI

I’m not a big fan of Ms. Ai-ai delas Alas but every time I get to watch Dreamscape’s Dyesebel, I would have this fondness for her symphatetic role as Banak.

Sa totoo, napakahusay ng portrayal ni Ms. Ai bilang Banak. Most of the time, napaka-effective niya sa kanyang introspective role.

If I look at her, walang-wala ang image ni Ai-ai delas Alas na every inch wacky and zany.

What I see is a woman who genuinely cares for her adoptive daughter Dyesebel.

Buti naman at siya ang napili ng Dreamscape people for this role.

Minsan pa, napatunayan ni Ms. Ai na isa si-yang aktres sa tunay na kahulugan nito.

Send in those sizzling stories that you know about our fave showbiz personalities at [email protected] and #09994269588, #09276557791 and #09223870129 and read them here.

And with that, ito po ang kuya Pete ninyo na nagsasabing, Christopher, my son, I love you very, very much, my love for you goes beyond eternity. Adios. Mabalos. I always need you, Nong!