1st Man: Swerte ko, my wife is an angel.
2nd Man: Buti ka pa, ako ang asawa ko buhay pa.
***
Anak: Tays! kakains nas tayos!
Tatay: Hoy! Tigilan mo ‘yang kalalagay mo ng ‘S’ sa mga sinasabi mo ha! Ano ba ang ulam?
Anak: BANGU na may KAMATI, ARDINA na may IBUYA!
***
BISAA 1: Unsay ibig sabihon ng “cooling place?”
BISAYA 2: Pag-naga ring ang fon, sabihon mo: “Hilow, hus cooling place?”
***
A Filipino, a Chinese man, and a Japanese guy are in a bar having a drink. When a gorgeous woman comes up to them and says, “Whoever can use the words ‘liver’ and ‘cheese’ in a creative sentence can have me for tonight.”
So the Chinese guy says “I love liver and cheese.” She says “That’s not good enough”
The Japanese man says “I hate liver and cheese” She says “That’s not creative”
Finally, the Filipino says “Liver alone, cheese mine!”