Aiza, lilipad ng US para sa planong IVF

NAGHAHANAP ng sagot si Aiza Seguerra.

Last year ko pa gustong magsulat ng reflection ko nitong nakaraang taon. Hindi ko mai-put together ‘yung mga iniisip ko at nararamdaman ko. Halo-halo na rin kasi. But I feel we need to go back to 2016 to get to where I’m at right now.

“Looking at my Facebook On This Day timeline, huli akong nakapagsulat for New Year noong pagpasok ng 2016. Hindi siya pagninilay-nilay but for the first time, isinulat ko ‘yung mga plano ko sa buhay ko. I’m not a planner so for me to have goals is something big.

“I wrote 3 things na gusto ko mangyari sa buhay ko. Una, gusto ko makapag-direct ng sariling film. 2017 marked my 30 years in the industry and I wanted to celebrate it by directing my first feature film. Sobra akong excited mangyari ‘yun. After being in the industry for a long time, I felt it was the direction I really wanted to take. Liza and I had so many stories na gusto namin gawing pelikula. From shorts to feature films. Every day, we would talk about these stories, how to make it better. For the first time in a long time, I was excited. At kung kilala mo ako, alam mong hindi ako madaling ma-excite.

“The second one, and perhaps the most important one, is for us to fly to the US for about 3 months and start our IVF journey. We’ve always wanted have a baby. Kahit si Amara excited. Sinisumulan na namin ang pagpaplano, kahit paano. I would need to work in the US for 3 months while we’re doing our check-ups and the whole thingamajig. Meron na kaming choices for clinics, may matitirahan na rin kami. May ilang shows na rin na na-book. Konting detalye na lang ang kailangan repasuhin pero pwede na i-go.

“Isa rin sa mga gusto ko mangyari is to be able to better provide for my family. Have more shows, more work, TV shows. Lahat na, para we have enough money to produce our films, do our IVF, live our lives and still be able to pay our bills and debts.

“This was my plan for 2016 and probably the next few years of my life. But as you all know, hindi ‘yun ang nangyari. Maganda na ‘yung standing ko sa trabaho ko rati. I am respected by my peers, I’ve found my place in this industry. Marami pang dapat ma-improve but generally, all is right in my world. People still buy my albums and watch my shows after being in this industry for a long time. I can support my family by doing something I love so much.

“Now, I am in a new world. Isang mundo na medyo pareho sa rati kong mundo but still very different. This is my second year working in the government but parang I still feel odd, I still feel out of place. Whenever I do something substantial it makes me alive. Parang ok lang na iniwan ko ‘yung dati kong mundo. I love serving the people. Pero we know that bulk of government work is bureaucracy and it’s something that I can never get used to.

“Sa totoo lang, ang daming questions sa sarili ko. Minsan hindi ako pinatutulog ng mga tanong ng utak ko, ng nararamdaman ko. Pakiramdam ko kasi, rati, malapit ko na maabot ‘yung tuktok ng isang mataas na bundok na buong buhay kong inakyat but then I decided to go down and climb a taller mountain way outside of my comfort zone. Did I make the right decision? Is this really for me?

“I have been working for 30 years. Minsan gusto ko na magpahinga, pero naisip ko 34 years old pa lang pala ako. Hindi pa puwede. Sa estado ko ngayon, hindi pa puwede. Kaya iniiwasan ko magnilay-nilay

dahil sa totoo lang, hindi ko alam kung nasaan ako ngayon. Hindi ko alam kung anong gusto kong mangyari. Hindi ko alam kung saan ako mapupunta pagkatapos nito.

“May trabaho pa ba akong babalikan after this? Will it be a totally different life after my stint in government? Am I doing an okay job? Am I really helping my country or am I slowly being sucked into the bureaucracy? Ako pa ba ‘to? Sino ba talaga ako?

“Ang daming tanong. Hindi ko alam ang sagot kundi “ewan ko” at “bahala na”. Hayaan na lang kung saan dalhin ng hangin. Ganoon naman eh. Mula noon, hanggang ngayon.”

Naibulalas na niya. Ang ewan at bahala na eh, puwedeng baka naman o akala ko…

MICHELLE,
MAY 3 INA

TATLONG ina!

Ang tema ng MMK (Maalaala Mo Kaya) na matutunghayan bukas (Enero 5) sa Kapamilya mula sa panulat ni Benson Logronio sa direksiyon ni Nuel Naval.

Magsasama-sama sina Michelle Vito as Gelai, Alma Moreno as Rose, Shamaine Buencamino as Linda, Andrea del Rosario as Gigi, Krystal Mejes as Young Gelai,Trina Legaspi as Young Gigi, Jef Gaitan as Young Linda, Karel Marquez as Young Rose, Ryle Santiago as Dave, Alex Diaz as Tony, Anjo Damiles as Jun,  at Lilygem Yulores as Jenny.

Ipinagkatiwala at ipinaalaga sa kanyang tiyahin si Gelai at mga kapatid dahil nagtatrabaho ang kanyang ina. At ang naging bunga eh, ang mas mapalapit sila sa kanilang tiyahing si Rose. At dahil naging spoiled, hindi inakala ng kanyang inang lalo lang itong mapapalayo sa kanya.

Dumating ang panahong nagkaroon na ng komprontasyon ang mga tiyahin at ang ina ni Gelai dahil sa naging bunga ng pagpapalaki sa kanya.

Paano kinaya ni Gelai ang pagsambulat ng nilalaman ng kanyang puso sa inikutan ng buhay niya. May dapat bang sisihin?

Unconditional love and care-who gave and showed it best?

HARDTALK
ni Pilar Mateo