Hindi pa rin nagpapakabog ang Jukebox Queens

IN demand pa rin sa guestings sina Eva Eugenio, Imelda Papin at Claire dela Fuente. Silang tatlo ang featured entertainer sa Family Feud na show ng super articulate na si Luis Manzano. Kalaban nila sina Ethel Booba, Ate Gay at si Atak na agaw-pansin talaga ang kasuotang fuchsia na cocktail dress. Hahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!

Anyway, after some three decades, it’s still interesting to note that the three jukebox queens still command quite a following.

Sila talaga ang nagtagal ang angking popularidad at sa kabila ng tatlong dekadang itinagal nila sa music industry, people seem not to tire of their presence.

Paano naman, bonggang-bongga pa rin naman ang kanilang vocal artistry at may dating pa rin naman ang tatlong orig na divas.

‘Yun nah!

NUMBER ONE PA RIN

Coco Martin is still the undisputed king of primetime as “FPJ’s Ang Probinsyano” hit a national TV rating of 35.5% versus its opponent which only got 25.1%.

Mahihirapan talagang itaob si Coco nang kahit sino mang competitor niya dahil kakaiba ang kanyang charisma at unmatched ang kanyang terrific PR. Kung ang ibang artista ay parang napapaso kapag magpapakuha na ng picture ang mga entertainment writers kasama sila, si Coco ay siya pa mismo ang lumalapit at magiliw na nagpapakuha ng picture with them.

Matandain pa siya sa name ng mga manunulat kaya feel na feel siya ng mga entertainment people.

No wonder, his soap, Ang Probinsyano, has remained unchallanged as the number one soap in the land today.

Pa’no naman, dito mo lang mapapanood ang mga bihira nang makaeksenang mga artista.

In spite of fame, Coco has remained levelheaded and the little people in the industry has a soft spot in his heart.

Mabuhay ka, idol!

BAKLA!

Mereseng bukong-buko na, marami pa rin pala ang naglalaway sa macho gay actor. Pa’no naman, he’s got the macho look if he would only behave and act like a straight guy.

Act like a straight guy, o! Hahahahahahahahahaha!

Anyway, in spite of his present status, all the while, he’s into the booking business occasionally.

So far, he’s charging a reasonable sum. He’s asking ten thousand per session and he would go all the way.

Would go all the way raw, o! Hahahahahahahahahaha!

Ang kaso, nadesmaya ang isang businessman na bading nang pag-enter palang niya sa condo ng macho gay na aktor ay i-welcome siya nito with open arms at ‘Welcome to my condo!’ ang tsika nito sabay kembot ng kanyang balakang in a manner na baklang-bakla. Hahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!

Anyhow, nandoon na rin lang, napasubo na rin ang businessman pero siyempre, hindi masyadong matindi ang dating ng kanyang erection kasi nagladlad kaagad ang pahadang macho gay.

But in fairness, nang makita naman ng businessman ang tarugs ng macho gay na pahada ay nakalimutan muna niya ang kanyang pagkadesmaya dahil que largo grande naman ang tarugs nito.

Kumbaga, tsalap-tsalap naman i-lollypop. Hahahahahahahahahahaha!

Sulit naman ang presyong ten K dahil performance level naman ang macho gay na pahada kuno. Hahahahahahahahahahaha!

HINDI RAW PINALAKAD SA RED CARPET

Hahahahahahahahahaha! How so very amusing. Hindi raw pala pinalakad sa red carpet sa katatapos na Star Magic Ball ang isang aktor dahil sa bangagelya raw ang beauty nito.

Baka raw maeskandalo pa, might as well na huwag na lang paglakarin sa red carpet.

Ano ba naman kasi ang drama ng not-so-young actor na ‘yan?

What is he so problematic about?

Palagi na lang nagkakaroon ng girlfriend pero ang ending ay hindi naman nagtatagal on the pretext that it was purportedly a long distance relationship.

Pero sinasadya naman yata ng aktor na mga foreigner ang kanyang makarelasyon dahil after a while ay tinitigbak din niya.

‘Yung iba nga ay pumupunta pa rito sa atin but to no avail. Nare-realize naman siguro nilang wala namang interes sa kanila ang aktor kaya umuuwi na lang sila sa kanilang bansa with tears in their eyes.

With tears in their eyes raw, o! Hahahahahahahahahahahaha!

How so pathetic!

Kung bakit kasi hindi na lang magladlad ang long haired actor.

That way, he would no longer be hurting the women he tends to ‘fall’ in love with fleetingly.

Feel in love fleetingly raw, o! Hahahahahahahahahahaha!

‘Yan kasi ang hirap kapag pahads ang ombre. In the end, he would no longer be attracted to women but would long for the company of good looking and virile young men as well.

How so very pathetic! Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!

Kaya kayong mga pahada, beware! Yesterday’s trade would surely become today’s competition.

One good example of this unpleasant metamorphosis is this brown-skinned actor.

Way back during his young, he was already into the skin trade. Kumbaga, pinau-umum niya ang kanyang matabang tarugs sa mga parloristas na more than willing namang chorvahin siya dahil may appeal naman ang ombre in spite of his dusky complexion.

Some two years ago, I was able to catch him checking in, in one of the motels in town.

Anyway, finally ay nag-asawa na siya pero tipong hindi pa rin tumitigil sa kanyang remunerative pastime.

Pahada nang pahada pa rin kaya ang ending, parang siya na rin ang gustong humada.

Siya na rin daw ang gustong humada, o! Harharharharharharhar!

Ayokooooooh! Hahahahahahahahahahahaha!

Send in those sizzling stories that you know about our fave showbiz personalities at [email protected] and #09994269588, #09276557791 and #09223870129 and read them here.

And with that, ito po ang kuya Pete ninyo na nagsasabing, Christopher, my son, I love you very, very much, my love for you goes beyond eternity. Adios. Mabalos. I always need you, Nong!

BANAT – Pete Ampoloquio, Jr.